Apa yang berlaku semalam dan harini.

Semalam adalah wedding Kak Tiqah and Afif. Sakit pinggang berdiri, penat tapi puas. Tak sempat ambik gambar dengan pengantin pon. Sobs.

So basically, tu je yang ada dalam camera aku. Selebihnya dalam camera photographer itu cos kitorang semua sibuk bertugas. Satu hari asyik senyum and cakap selamat datang, so bila balik rumah aku tercakap selamat datang instead of bagi salam. Wekeke.

And today, kitorang group A1 belajar cemane nak pasang POP cast. POP stands for Plaster of Paris and this thing is applied for those who had fractures kat anggota badan.

So before kitorang apply kan bendalah tu kat patient, kitorang semua diwajibkan merasa apa perasaannya bila tangan terpaksa dibalut ngan bendalah tu. Personally I hate it. Tak suka sebab tangan takleh gerak and cast tu mengeluarkan haba yang maha dahsyat. Panaaaassss dan beraaaaaaaat.

Benda yang kat tangan beliau tu namanya vibrating saw. SAW ok SAW. Scary merry lah kami dengan benda ni. Bendalah ni digunakan ntuk remove the cast. Cast tu bila dah kering dia akan jadi sangat lah keras and to those yang ada fractures di mana mana, mereka harus pakai benda tu for about 6 weeks, depends on the severity of the fracture and types of fracture bla bla. So cuba bayangkan pakai bendalah berat dan panas dan sangat irritating pada skin itu selama 6 minggu! Argh tak sukanyaaa. Harap harap aku tak kan ada pengalaman pakai bendalah ni sobs. So bila dah 6 minggu melekat kat limb seseorang, its time to get rid of it by using that saw. Yes, that saw.

Itu Dr Alla yang sedang mengexplain pasal saw tu kat patient. Beliau siap try kat tangan beliau lagi to comfort her yang dah berpeluh peluh itu and to convince her that the procedure is safe. Aku pon meniru aksi Dr Alla before aku removekan cast pada Saleha and yes, benda tu sangat ticklish. Tak sakit dan melukakan tapi menggelikan.

Saleha sedih cos her artwork is about to be destroyed by that saw and me, was terrified, praying I'm not gonna lose my limb to that thing. Walaupun aku dah removekan cast pada Saleha dengan benda tu and dah tau bahawasanya benda tu tak bahaya but still rasa takut and nervous. Pentakut.

That was her reaction apabila Dr Alla proceed with the procedure, and my reaction .. you don't want to know. WORSE. Ok tu je, assalamualaikum

Comments

aku memang gedik!

Woha. I'm home and gosh super duper happy! Happier than pegi ice skating iteww. Puhleassse, 'itew'? WTH. Pi masuk tadika balik. Eja itu pon tak reti ke afi woi? Wakaka. Tadi waktu melangut dalam kereta segala macam jawapan soalan exam tetiba dengan sukarelanya mengeluarkan diri dari tempat persembunyian di antara celahan otak saya ini. Isk. Gedik mengada. Kenapa baru sekarang kau keluar? Pegila menyorok lagi!! Arghh. But on the bright side, at least I know that I KNOW what I am suppose to KNOW. So telan jela. And you see while I was in the car, I signed in YM and guess what, terdapat seorang hamba Allah bernama M5 yang telah mencuba mengadd and menegur saya disitu. *sila maafkan ayat keling ini*. Our conversation went smooth pada permulaannya cos he acted like someone I know and we talked about something interesting which was good because I usually did that to confirm the person adding me is a real HUMAN before I added him to my YM list. But then he started to ...

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..It feels weird.

Perasaan pelik. Rasa happy but in the meantime rasa sedih waktu tengok gambar cousins aku yang berdua itu. We were so close when we were little girls tapi sekarang, masing masing dah ada hidup sendiri. Hala tuju sendiri. Semalam kak D kahwin. Gambar dah upload sikit kat facebook. Nak keluar air mata aku yang mentengok ni. Belum lagi mak long. Huish. Susah kan jadi mak? Jadi sila hargai ibu anda. Dan tadi jugak, sempat mengusha gambar kak S bertunang. Rasa macam ada rama rama dalam perut. Rasa macam nak jerit wah cantiknya kuat kuat and rasa cam nak cakap eee jelesnya. Motif? Heheh. So moral of the story is, semua dah besar panjang. Dah ada tanggungjawab masing masing. I hope everything about us won't change. How I wish adults don't have to create such barrier ya know. The barrier when they already have their own family and they seems to depart off from the big family. I hate that. Apa aku merepek ni? Ok tu je, assalamualaikum

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Saiko

I wonder what had gotten into me before when I used to fight so strong just to be in this course. Babah agak tak suka saya amek course ni. Babah cakap, "You'll have no life." and "Once you step in that field, its equal to learn throughout ur whole life". Tapi saya yang dulu tak kesah ngan semua benda yang babah cakap. As long as he still supports me walaupun selalu cakap keburukan amek medic, I keep my head held high. Tak pandang belakang dah. I made my decision and that's it. No turning back. Tapi sekarang saya jadi keliru. Can I do this? Am I fit enough to be a good doctor? Can I diagnose correctly? Can I treat the patient the way I'm taught? Can I be like my lecturers who are super awesome? Can I? Bimbang. Keliru. Sometimes I feel like giving up. Rasa macam tak layak. Tengok semorang dah progress but me? Still kat takuk yang lama. Even worse, dah turun beberapa anak tangga. I tried to talk to my close friends abut this. But no help at all....

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Past Tense

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